Why Groaning Might Be the Secret to Better Mental Health
Have you ever hit that point in life where words fail you, deep breaths don’t cut it, and all you can do is let out a long, dramatic groan? Maybe it’s after a stressful day, a frustrating conversation, or just the weight of everything pressing down on you. If you’ve ever flopped onto the couch and exhaled an ugh so deep it felt like it came from your soul, congratulations—you’ve instinctively practiced one of the simplest forms of emotional release.
At Anchoring Hope Counseling, we recently joked about hosting an event where we all bring a yoga mat, lay on the floor, and collectively wail, “I’M SO DONE!” for an hour. What started as a lighthearted social media post turned into something surprisingly relatable—because, deep down, we all need permission to be “done” sometimes. But what if this wasn’t just a joke? What if groaning, sighing, and expressing frustration were actually good for us?
The Science of Groaning: Why It Feels So Good
As ridiculous as it may seem, groaning is an underrated stress reliever. It turns out, making that deep, exasperated sound isn’t just dramatic—it’s biological. Here’s why:
Groaning Triggers a Relaxation Response
When we sigh or groan, we are naturally extending our exhalation, which engages the parasympathetic nervous system (our body’s “rest and digest” mode). This helps slow the heart rate and signals to our brain that we are safe enough to relax, even if just for a moment.It Helps Release Physical Tension
Stress isn’t just a mental experience—it lives in the body. Whether it’s tight shoulders, clenched jaws, or headaches, our emotions manifest physically. Groaning forces us to let go, even if briefly, which can reduce some of that tension.It’s a Social Cue That We Need Support
Ever noticed how we instinctively sigh or groan in front of others when we’re overwhelmed? It’s often a nonverbal way of signaling to those around us that we need empathy, humor, or even just acknowledgment that things are hard. Humans are wired for connection, and these sounds can be subtle bids for emotional validation.It’s a Form of Mindfulness
Rather than suppressing frustration, groaning is a way of being present with it. In that moment, we aren’t ignoring our stress or distracting ourselves—we’re fully acknowledging it. This is an important first step in emotional regulation.
Sitting With Your Feelings: Why Avoidance Isn’t the Answer
So many of us are conditioned to push past discomfort. We say, I just need to stay busy or I don’t have time to feel this right now. While there are times when distractions can be useful, constantly avoiding our emotions can backfire. Here’s why:
What We Resist, Persists
Have you ever tried to push a difficult feeling away, only to have it come back stronger? That’s because unprocessed emotions don’t disappear—they build up, often resurfacing as anxiety, irritability, or even physical symptoms like headaches or exhaustion.Avoidance Leads to Emotional Burnout
When we suppress our stress, we don’t actually get rid of it. Instead, it lingers beneath the surface, draining our energy. Over time, constantly avoiding emotions can lead to burnout, making even small challenges feel overwhelming.Acknowledging Feelings is the First Step Toward Processing Them
Sitting with discomfort doesn’t mean wallowing in it. It means recognizing what’s there, naming it, and allowing yourself to experience the feeling rather than pushing it away. This can make it easier to understand what you need—whether that’s rest, a boundary, or a change in perspective.
Creating Space to Say “I’m So Done”
So, what if we actually held an event where people could come together, lay down, and groan their stress away? What if we gave ourselves permission to be dramatic, to sigh loudly, to acknowledge how much everything feels sometimes? Maybe it sounds ridiculous, but maybe—just maybe—it’s exactly what we need.
A “groaning circle” could serve as:
A space to express emotions freely, without judgment.
A reminder that none of us are alone in our stress or exhaustion.
A way to reset our nervous system through vocal and physical release.
A lighthearted but meaningful practice in self-acceptance.
Practical Ways to Sit With Your Emotions (Besides Groaning)
If a full hour of dramatic groaning isn’t quite your thing, there are other ways to acknowledge your emotions in a healthy way:
Body Scans – Take a moment to notice where you’re holding tension. Breathe into those areas and see if you can soften them.
Journaling – Write out your thoughts unfiltered, without worrying about solutions.
Talking it Out – Vent to a trusted friend or therapist who won’t rush you to “fix” things.
Intentional Sighing – Take a deep breath in, and let out an exaggerated sigh. Do this a few times and notice how it changes your mood.
Gentle Movement – Stretch, shake out your arms, or go for a slow walk while tuning into what you’re feeling.
Give Yourself Permission to Be “Done”
There’s no shame in admitting when you’re exhausted, overwhelmed, or just plain over it. In fact, naming it can be the most productive thing you do—because once you acknowledge your feelings, you can decide what to do with them.
So, if you find yourself needing to flop onto the couch and groan today, go for it. If you want to sigh so loudly that the neighbors hear, we support you. And if you’d actually show up to a collective groaning event? Let us know. You might just be onto something.
Because sometimes, the best thing we can do for our mental health isn’t pushing through—it’s giving ourselves permission to say, “I’m so done.”
Ready to Sit With Your Feelings?
At Anchoring Hope Counseling, we believe in the power of emotional expression and creating space for healing. If you're ready to explore your feelings, release stress, and take a step toward mental wellness, we’re here for you.
Contact us today to schedule a session and start your journey toward emotional freedom.
